Sunday, November 27, 2011

Been dumped

Last thursday 24/11/11
Everything in my world is changed
He sent me an email and said want broke up
At the moment i saw the email,
i am nearly fainted.
I never expect this will happen
After that,
what i did is just cry
i really dunno why he left me
I really wn to ask him face to face

Next day
i told my friends about this
i cnt control myself and cried in front of them
They kept on confort me and encourage me
I really dunno wat i can do except cry.
At that time, my other friends msg me and ask me went to cameron highlands with them
i agree
So i went to Ipoh and they fetch me there

Along the way to Cameron Highlands, only i knew that actually they suppose to back Penang tat day bt because of me, they stayed for one night
Thanks to my friends
We went to night market enjoy a lot of food
In the midnight,
only i noticed that i cant control my tears to drop
I cried non stop
in front of a geng of friends which never see me cry
I cnt slp well whole night

Today
i commit suicided.
Almost ate a bottle of sleeping pills
my younger sister knocked my door thn saw it
she very scare
immediately she called my parents
THey sent me to hospital
my parents never expect i will do this
they felt regret and sad
i doesnt meant to use die to let him come back to me
Is i cnt think rationally
In the evening,
i begged my parents to let me discharge
They allowed and they said nothing

I really want to ask him
If u left me is because ur business
why u think that i stay beside you is make myself suffer.
Did u ever think tat i want to accompany you to expand your business?
I wishes i can be the one always support u
but now
all are dream
Dreams that never come true

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Pressure

Just passed up an assignment
another one is next wed
so tension when see the assignment and journals
can i hv a class tat not related to exam or assignments?

He and i be together more thn one month only
but both of us feel that we like together for a long time ald
how come?
but it really sweet

he is so care about me
he can cook too
haha
i m really is a lucky gurl
^_^

Wednesday, November 9, 2011

I dun want like this

Starting cold war with him
i really dun wn like this
Now only i understand
not only him tat dun like to be control
i also dun like
both of us too eager to win
so no one want to admit the fault

Bt now
i m the person always said sorry to him
is tat really all my fault?
now the way he talked to me at fb is like a stranger
his msg fulled with anger and dislike
is tat what i deserved to get?

when i started to use the blog again,
is i wn to share my happiness with all my friends
because i knew he deserve tat
now i kept on lower my limit
did he really CARE?

i never expect our relationship with hv a such big gap now
but i m glad is now.
if after marry only find out this problem,
sure will fighting everyday....

For me
my heart is always for him only
bt did he know?
The only que that i asked myself several times per hour..
Can we back to beginning?
Can we still be together?
Did he still remember?
Our coming soon one month anniversary...
I wishes he will remember

Tuesday, November 8, 2011

How to solve it?

Last nite,
i did a stupid thing..
i msg him n request for temporary seperation.
After he online, he just said that he respect my decision.
Tat is nt the purpose i wrote that.
what i wn is his understanding, caring

Few weeks ago,
we started argued.
at the same time, we nt call each other frequently
i m really worry,
Is that our relationship going to the end?
I dunn wn...

So difficult only we together
i dun wn to give up so easily
just because

I LOVE HIM

but now
i just wn he back to my side
i m wontdering

CAN WE?

Saturday, November 5, 2011

Dissapointed

Today he said he is very dissapointed to me
How hurt am i when i saw the msg
Ya, its my fault when asked his frend whether he is with him
bt tat is because i worry him
he never never know that
because he NEVER wnt to know wat i m thinking

He kept on said he love me
bt feel like all are lies
he care his friends more thn me
he prefer to play game bt nt reply my msg

ENOUGH FOR ME ALD
is tat he in a relationship with me is just to show off?
Or just because every of his friends are in a relationship so he need to do so too?
is tat he really love me?

I cn feel tat his heart is not on me
What should i do?
After he kept on hurt me?
Break up?
Be patient?
I really dunno...